OMG – You Killed Kenny! And other social media DOHs.

OMG – You Killed Kenny!
by Stan Faryna

Stan Faryna

Today, the Jack B shakes his fist at third-rate bloggers and blog readers that lack the sense to know and love a good thing when they see it. Read it in his blog post, Your Blog Bores Me. Like counterpoint, Aaron Biebert writes about how you should be writing for and to the people reading you. You can read it in his blog post, You Are Reading This. On a deeper level, Jack and Aaron are saying the same thing to me.

And then there’s the Not Just Another [Boring] Business Podcast hosted by James St. John and Yomar Lopez. Episode 1 and 1.5 with me as a guest. You can find that here or individually, here and there.

Hurts, Wonderful Life

There may be better blog posts and pods casts out there, but today I encourage you to NOT put yet another full day and night into aimlessly consuming blogs and pods because you got to stuff the emptiness. Like you, I feel that hunger to feel strongly and live wholeheartedly.

This and the three other links, however, is more than enough. No, really! Go do other things too. Get work done. Kiss someone written in your heart. Receive kisses – thankfully.

Of course, think about these blog posts and pod casts. Think about what we’ve written or said. Separately and together. Take a couple of hours to reflect on what we’re saying.

You don’t have to agree with any one of us. Just go deep!

Then come back and share your honest, un-muted reflections and feelings with all of us. Copy and paste it to each comment platform. Sign your comment. Leave us a link to a blog post that means everything to you. It could be yours or by someone else.

That’s engagement. And, maybe, today, Kenny of South Park doesn’t have to die. Because every day that you fail to engage in a conversation or relationship, online or offline, you’re killing Kenny.

Or, maybe, you are a Basterd. In that case, feel free to kill Kenny, live with the mute on, and waste away with a stack of self-help books, blogs where the blind encourage the blind, and Twittery inspirations.

Oh – here’s the links again:

1. Your Blog Bores Me by The Jack B

http://www.thejackb.com/2011/09/25/your-blog-bores-me

2. You Are Reading This by Aaron Biebert

http://8pmwarrior.com/2011/09/you-are-reading-this

3. Not Just Another Business Podcast Episodes 1 and 1.5

http://marketinganswerman.com/podcast-2

Stan Faryna
26 September 2011
Bucharest, Romania

P.S. Your $5 can make a difference. If you can get 10 of your friends to give $5 too, you will make an even bigger difference. Please help Nisha to help others.

Faryna Podcasts recently produced by Adrian Klein:

1. Why do I blog: Faryna Podcast EP1
http://wp.me/pbg0R-kX

2. If Tomorrow Was Your Last Day: Faryna Podcast EP2
http://wp.me/pbg0R-la

3. Money Can’t Buy Happiness: Faryna Podcast EP3
http://wp.me/pbg0R-lv

4. The First Duty of Love is to Listen: Faryna Podcast EP4
http://wp.me/pbg0R-lO

5. Are You Ready for Love? Faryna Podcast EP5
http://wp.me/pbg0R-lX

6. Reading The Desiderata. Faryna Podcast EP6
http://wp.me/pbg0R-mr

7. What is Love? Faryna Podcast EP7
http://wp.me/pbg0R-mw

8. Confessions of a Freak-Geek-Misfit. Faryna Podcast EP8
http://wp.me/pbg0R-nJ

9. Do you love strongly? Faryna Podcast EP9
http://wp.me/pbg0R-nY

10. Empty-handed, Less Traveled Roads. Faryna Podcast EP10
http://wp.me/pbg0R-on

11. The Economics of Friendship. Faryna Podcast EP11
http://wp.me/pbg0R-oU

12. Do Not Be Afraid. Faryna Podcast EP12
http://wp.me/pbg0R-p9

Note: If you want to make a professional podcast out of your blog post, get in touch with Adrian Klein on Twitter or Facebook.

28 Responses to OMG – You Killed Kenny! And other social media DOHs.

  1. Yogizilla says:

    We don’t want any more kittens or Kenny to suffer so please take a moment and at least check out one of those links. Aaron Biebert and THE Jack B are amongst my favorite little-known thought leaders.. They stir emotion and introspection, which I personally tend to find more useful than you typical “actionable” content. Thanks for spreading the words about the #NJAB podcast. It’s our humble way of giving back to the online community (particularly fellow small biz and bloggers). 8)

    • Stan Faryna says:

      I heart Dino Dogan. He’s cool. DIno is funny and he says what he means. You gotta respect that. I’m bummed out, however, because Dino says my problem is that I don’t write actionable blog posts. He also says my choice of blog platform sucks. Anyway, Dino doesn’t want a guest blog post from me because he’s suggesting that I am not writing for his audience at DIY blogger.

      But it’s not just Dino.

      I should change my blogging platform. WordPress.com sucks for anyone serious about blogging. A self-hosted wordpress blog platform would up the likes, G+s, comments, and subscriptions. And now that I have 10,000+ readers/visits per month, I should take this blogging thing seriously. As a blogger – as opposed to a writer, someone who wanted to reach out to the world, and someone who wanted to connect with other people out there.

      Dino has suggested that I write a guest blog post about how I moved my blog to a self-hosted solution. Even if I did move it, I don’t want to write about that. Let’s just say that me doing technical training or professional education doesn’t excite me. This does not mean that I am against technical training. I’m a fan. I am a big believer in adult education and skills training. I even developed online training technologies for safety training.

      The liberal arts education, however, is something I am all about. For all the reasons that C.S. Lewis, Thomas Jefferson, and many other giants were champions of the liberal arts education. I may even write a blog post about that one day soon. About why the classical liberal arts education is essential to civilization, democracy, and self-understanding a la Plato, C.G.Jung, et al.

      I write with certain attention and passion about our existential situation, human predicaments, existential anxiety, the dignity of the human person, hope, despair, freedom, suffering, and, yes, human destiny. That’s where I’m coming from. And, yeah, that may make my voice an unpopular voice. According to the die-hard SEO people, I’m irrelevant. Maybe, I will never speak to the hundreds of millions.

      That’s not saying that I don’t want to speak to them. But I gotta do what I do because that’s all I got to give. Because whatever I can give and share has got to be true. The world is overwhelmed as it is. With diabolical counterfeit. Just as Sartre had suggested.

      Just as Christ warned.

      • Betsy Cross says:

        You can have my self-hosted…LOL I don’t even use it! Someday…

        “I write with certain attention and passion about our existential situation, human predicaments, existential anxiety, the dignity of the human person, hope, despair, and, yes, human destiny

        Why would you think that voice is unpopular? I think that voice is the one everyone is listening for. The one that sees the human spirit in its human condition, seeking its potential.

        A Thomas Jefferson Education, by Oliver and Rachel Deville is a book I found years ago whose philosophies are priceless. I love their “stick, carrot, love affair” analogies to the 3 types of education. I can sink my teeth into subjects that open my eyes to possibilities for growth.

        I have to stop! I could go on and on.
        Good luck with the post!
        Hope this wasn’t too distracting! LOL!

      • If 10,000 visitors a month is unpopular, then I think we need to come up with a new definition of popular…

      • Yogizilla says:

        Oh boy, Stan.. You know, we discussed this extensively in our chat with @dino_dogan on the #NJAB podcast. Those episodes may be released sooner than later since the topics thereof are REALLY hot (he reveals some of the upcoming Triberr features and shares some exclusive insight there, BTW).

        http://marketinganswerman.com/podcast-2

        I’m with you, Stan, in more ways than you may understand.. I hope I can do more to support you as I get better about being efficient with my time management. You’re one of the folks that truly speaks to my soul, brotha.

        Here’s my take on what you spoke to with regards to popularity, blogging “success”, and creating a voice that resonates with others…

        It’s not easy saying something different. You’re creative and unique, which is more than most can claim. I’m not saying that because you’re my friend, either.

        Truth be told, and I may upset some folks here, but most bloggers that people are swooning about are merely jumping on hot trends and developing what they consider to be “actionable” posts. Lists and how-to posts have their place and I’m sure you and I can write tons of them.. but we don’t want to.

        Like me, you rather be a trend setter than a follower. That takes time to gain traction but you have the track record of proven success to back you up, bro.. So no worries.

        Dino is someone I consider a friend and and inspiration.. Maybe even a role model. He calls it how he sees it and I appreciate his honesty.

        He’s right that our approach limits us but it doesn’t make us “wrong”. As Betsy said, your voice is not unpopular.. It’s just not mainstream. We embrace the notion of “small is the new big” and it works for us.

        Keep in mind that these blogs with tons of comments are riddled with people that are just looking for link juice and some of the massive audiences redirecting to their content. There’s a lack of sincere/authentic participation there. Is this truly engagement?

        Just look at the comments on top blogs where we see 200+ comments and thousands, if not millions, of clicks, shares, backlinks, and mentions. The comments in particular indicate that people are not talking with each other. These are tribes in the Seth Godin sense, whereas people are there to get the “thought leader” to acknowledge them so that they can name drop and say, “We are friends.” OR “He thinks I am important.”

        Time and time again, I notice that folks are disregarding what others are saying in the comments for the most part.. I know it’s hard when there is so much noise but, let’s face it: most respond to the folks they think matter, typically labeling others as “influencers” or “nobodies”.

        The good news is that I think we’ve challenged those beliefs. I think in terms of authenticity, engagement, enriching lives, helping others, and making big changes.. That’s true conversion and influence there, I’d say.

        If you couldn’t tell, this is a HUGE thing for me. I feel pretty proud of my stats here:

        http://unbounce.com/social-media/the-secret-sauce-behind-social-blog-post-promotion/#comment-187891

        We can learn a lot from the #ConversionFest contest. The numbers sometimes lie but, in this case, they’re pretty spot-on. Check out the bounce and conversion rates for James St. John and I.

        I share this all not to impress you but, rather, impress upon you the fact that you have are a changemaker. I’m sure if you wrote a book or recorded a personal-development album, people would respond in BIG ways. I’d buy it.. And I’m not necessarily wealthy in the sense of dollar signs.. But I have a wealth of knowledge and people that appreciate what I am doing, as do you.

        I hope that inspires you. Don’t be bummed, bro – you ROCK! You’re a rockstar, in the good sense! ;o)

  2. “Since last night I’ve been thinking long and hard about this, I listened to Stan and Yomar’s Podcast http://t.co/x3p9zvC0 and felt a light bulb go on (Sorry) . I write to be heard; to matter. I write because there are people online who will read what I have to say and I will feel human for a few minutes. The internet is an amazing tool that helps me find the gems who resonate with me. I’d much prefer someone I can reach out and touch, and I do have a few of those that I’m working with. But they can be few and far between. My real life relationships meet other needs. I consider myself very lucky having very low reader stats and comments. I haven’t lost the focus of staying true to what moves me and what I feel like I’m here to do. One good comment can fuel me for a long time! I can pretty much sum up how I feel about showing up for anything I like to do in life with a look at Forest Gump. He’s one of my heroes!! I love his character because he didn’t stress about how good he was at anything. But his performance was always top-notch.”

    • Stan Faryna says:

      Betsy,

      You encourage me by speaking your truth. Your comment made me feel I am human. Because you “see” me (a la Avatar). Because I feel just as you do. Because you see you through me. Because you see the good, the true, and the beautiful (if only dimly) through me.

      This is something for me to think more about. And something to be explored in all the emotions which belong to the experience.

      This is what was compressed in my humble WOW with which I replied to you by email.

      I feel the same way. That we write to be heard. Even when we must write for ourselves as The Jack B so often reminds us (and himself). And as Jack hints at, we are also hearing ourselves. We are also a reader of our writing.

      More soon…

      • Yogizilla says:

        We all develop content to be heard but, more importantly, by the right people. You both have drawn in people that are not just like-minded but really care about and like you. That’s important. As I say so often, I rather have a small audience of people that are super-excited about what I am doing than a massive audience filled with posers, obligatory reciprocators, and liars.

        That may be a strong statement but this is not to discredit reciprocation and more passive supporters. You guys matter too.. but I’m looking to define my core audience and, from that, build up my friendships, inner circle, mastermind groups, and what I like to call work-OUT buddies (accountability partners).

        Check out Paul Morin’s thoughts on this stuff…

        http://www.companyfounder.com/2011/09/be-bold-rise-above-the-noise/

        http://www.companyfounder.com/2011/09/selling-tip-1-you-had-me-at-pathos/

        http://www.companyfounder.com/2011/09/the-pareto-principle-for-entrepreneurs/

        They each relate in different ways. The conversations we’re building up there are even better!

        Be a little crazy, make some life-long friends (and enemies/doubters), and take a stand. Keep doing what you are doing, everyone. Don’t let anyone tell you it’s wrong or you’re not following the rules.

        Break the rules.

        http://desserfirstblog.com

        Stacy Reck understands the need to free your soul and do what you truly believe in. If you’ve found your purpose in life, you’re already better off than most. Few folks really are driven by principles, missions, and visions.. At least, that is what I see.

        (Make sure you check out her eBook, “The Rule Breaker’s Manifesto”, for some wonderfully uplifting messages!)

        Sure, we all need to make a living.. But I prefer helping others, sharing stories around a (virtual) camp fire, and giving value (for FREE, at least initially) over selling, convincing, or what have you. I gather you all are in the same boat so.. I appreciate you.

        #youmattertome
        #youmatter

  3. Yogizilla says:

    Beautiful thoughts here, Betsy. We sometimes seek too much affirmation and validation, forgetting to just follow our hearts and find more motivation within ourselves.

    I will say this: in all honesty, I’ve been more connected with my online friends lately.. But it is magical when that translates to offline engagement. Lines are blurred and family extended.

    I’ve been getting my family involved in social media and it’s great just being able to catch up. The social web makes it darn near impossible to miss a moment or forget the little things. New media is a blessing.. When used right.

    What I gather from Stan here is that we should isten more and stop to smell the prooverbial roses. Preach it!

  4. Stan, you are really awesome! Thanks for this post. It means a lot to be mentioned by you in the same paragraph as Jack.

    I read Jack’s post and really do think we’re saying the same thing. he says don’t write crap and I say don’t write crap. 🙂

    Also, thanks for saving Kenny. Someone has to…

    • Stan Faryna says:

      It’s good to hear from you, Aaron. You know I read all your posts. They’re quick reads. And that’s not a bad thing. They get me thinking. Not that I don’t already think too much – says my GF!

      Exactly, you and Jack are saying, don’t write crap. I cover the other side of the story. Don’t make your life crap.

      And today, today is a good day for Kenny. [grin]

      • Yogizilla says:

        Oh boy!

        We certainly have to be mindful of consuming too much crap and cutting the junk from our lives. I am proud to say I have cut down on the amount of TV and mainstream pop culture crap I am consuming. That stuff doesn’t have much value yet it is some of the most popular stuff out there.

        Why?

        Again, people like quick-and-easy for the most part.. But there are folks looking to really connect and take in a message that makes them feel complete.

        You, my friend, fill a void. Aaron and JackB are the same way. I don’t always get to reach out to everyone’s content as much as I’d like to (I got mouths to feed, after all) but their stuff always pleases my heart.

        I’m glad we saved Kenny today. ;o)

  5. I read and commented on Jack’s post Stan and know where he’s coming from.

    I guess I’m very fortunate that I don’t visit a lot of blogs that only are trying to sell me on something. I have a lot of blogging friends that are here to share their experiences so we can learn from them as well. I hope that’s what I’m achieving over at my place anyway.

    I just enjoy helping those who feel lost in the online world because a lot of them are here to make a better life for their family. I certainly can’t blame them for that, it’s why I’m here as well. If one little thing that I share on my blog can help them then my work is done.

    Great post Stan and I absolutely agree with you. From your lips to other’s ears…

    ~Adrienne

    • Stan Faryna says:

      I appreciate you, Adrienne. And my heart goes out to you. I know that you are doing everything you can to reach out, connect, and share what you have to share. I hope it fills your heart as much as it fills your head. I feel your loneliness and emptiness, but I also admire your courage and enthusiasm to keep on keeping on.

      And yes, I also come to the table with certain emptiness. That’s nothing to be ashamed of. It’s part of what makes us human, real, and – yes- breathlessly beautiful.

    • Yogizilla says:

      Hi Adrienne!

      What’s interesting here is that we are all “selling” something. At the very least, we’re giving of ourselves and hoping someone responds with great exuberance there… Maybe even with open arms, warm smiles, and big hugs.

      Sadly, some folks see that as bubble gum. You know, it’s great to chew on it but you can do without it. That’s hogwash.

      If you don’t care about relationships, are you really living? The sales will come naturally when you truly care about others. We’re seeing an emptiness that is going unnoticed.

      People need to be nurtured, acknowledged, and loved.. Show more appreciation, build your efforts around gratitude and helping others before yourself. And don’t expect anything in return.. That will come in it’s time.

      With information traveling faster than the speed of light these days, we need to remember that people are watching. If you’re persistent, it’s inevitable that you’ll get noticed by the people that matter most, the people whose lives we are trying to enrich. When we can empower others and help them succeed, WE succeed.

      It’s really quite simple. It’s not about mere reciprocation but, rather, authentic engagement. That doesn’t mean going above and beyond all the time (or feeling obliged to) but, when you do, you bet your tootsie roll that someone will noticed and go, “WOW.. This person.. I want to be more like them.. I need to get to know them better.”

      Even if that doesn’t click with your immediate audience, remember that folks are spread thin.. And there’s something magical that happens when they tell a friend…

      http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CDUQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fbalancing-life-works.blogspot.com%2F2011%2F08%2Ftell-friend-magical-power-of-ten.html&ei=DvWBTt-LNMiltwee_NHpAQ&usg=AFQjCNH31hi4S0fpjDickAEtd2SswqUDSg

  6. Stan Faryna says:

    A message to the Universe:

    I need a MacBook Pro 17-inch Laptop: 2.3GHz Quad-core Intel Core i7, 8GB SDRAM, 512 Solid State Drive, Anti-Glare Display, and External Thunderbolt Storage Promise Pegasus R4 4TB.

    Email me for a shipping address. [grin]

    stan(dot)faryna(at)gmail(dot)com

  7. Your help, words and links are always appreciated.

  8. Stan, aloha. Great post topic well handled. Though I have not finished listening to all of your podcast, I am absolutely loving what I am hearing. You three play off each other very well. Because you folks are engaging with easy-to-listen to voices, it is a pleasure listening to it.

    As I said in my comment to Jack, it must be a time of reflection by bloggers because I have come across quite a number of posts lately of a similar nature.

    Here is a link to a post Bill Dorman wrote recently. Both his post and the comments section give a lot of meat for chewing.

    http://billdorman.me/2011/09/19/ive-been-kicked-out-of-my-house/

    Stan, it all gets back to the question of “Why do you blog?” The answer for each of us is different.

    Some blog strictly for the money and my hat’s off to them for their ability to develop and to maintain a blog that produces the results they want.

    Far more often, Stan, I believe people blog because of a tremendous need to express themselves in the hopes of being heard. They are writing to clarify a thought, reflect on a situation or ponder what the future can be.

    Over time, the direction of our blog and what we want to accomplish may well change. In fact, it is a good sign if it does because that means growth. The better we are articulate what is in our hearts and minds, the better the feedback can be. As a result of better communication, both we and our blog evolve.

    Until later when I have finished listening to the podcast, aloha. Janet

  9. billdorman says:

    Interesting podcast; so existential provided the tingly….

    You touched on many topics that certainly were true; anonymity in numbers, creating your online persona, filling a void in your life, etc. It all made sense and all had truth as well.

    I’m definitely a Coke guy but I’m a deep south guy so it’s only appropriate. So Yomar spent some Georgia time, huh?

    Thanks for sharing, enjoyed it. Hope all is well with you.

    • Yogizilla says:

      I’m glad you enjoyed the podcast. Stan @Faryna will definitely be back on #NJAB as a revolving guest host. Heck, we may just have him come along for every recording session if we can.. But then we may overwhelm you all with the thought bombs “we be droppin”. Haha

      I’ve been in Georgia for about 4 years now.. I really have no concept of time in that regards because I feel like I’ve been here so much longer, in a good way. That said, I may move deeper South to be closer with family. I am a bit of a nomad at times yet, ironically, not keen on travel due to the headaches thereof sometimes. ;o)

      Remember, folks, we’d love to have your feedback over at http://marketinganswerman.com as we’ll be looking for more guests and farming your questions/answers for more discussion topics. We love getting some round table discussions going on Skype.

      For me, Skype is where I do a lot of coaching, training, and relationship-building with my inner circle and biggest clients. I love it and hope you all find it handy-dandy too! 8)

      • billdorman says:

        That onion was peeled pretty deep, I don’t think there was much skin left.

        If you come any further south, you’ll be in my neck of the woods (we say that down south……….:) in central Florida; the land of Disney and Legoland.

  10. I agree that we all blog for different reasons and with different purposes in mind, but we all want to “connect” with our readers and to do that, both our voices and our words have to be authentic.

  11. Stan, your blog is all about connecting. I visit blogs I enjoy to make a connection and to learn. I’ve not only been able to connect with you, I’ve been able to connect with other amazing bloggers through you. I would cherish your posts even without any connections, but they enrich the experience tremendously. Thank you for doing all that you do. I agree, life is too short to waste on reading blogs without quality content. Better to savor blogs that enrich you, whether or not they produce a link back.

    As Betsy said here and on Bill’s blog post today, it’s the quality, not the quantity of the readers that counts (at least for those not monetizing our blogs, lol).

    Thanks for sharing this with us, Stan!

    • Yogizilla says:

      Right on, fellow @rockstartribe member!

      Even if you ARE monetizing, consider that a highly-engaged audience built around focused or at least compelling content is more likely to convert in many ways. Really, those massive numbers that people get hung up on have value only for…

      * Hand-picking advertisers and affiliates.
      * Selling your domain/site to an interested buyer.
      * Playing the numbers game and being a robotic broadcaster.

      That’s pretty much it. So find some encouragement in that because it’s the darn truth! =oD

      (And, yes, I must get on visiting everyone’s blog more consistently.. and not lurking so much. I’m working on that, believe me.. Because you guys matter!)

      #youmattertome

    • Stan Faryna says:

      My laptop is on the blink. The browser shuts down and my internet connection drops unexpectedly from time to time.

      Anyway, I love how you have me all figured out, Carolyn. It fuels me to do good, to be true, to love, and to serve.

      I appreciate you, Carolyn.

  12. about social networking…

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